When the narcissist realizes you are done: If you suspect that your relationship with a narcissist is ending, there are certain signs to look out for.
These can include a:
- Heavier interest in another person,
- Apathy towards your wants and needs, and
- Shift in behavior.
But the best way to know that a narcissist is done with you is to wait.
When the Narcissist Realizes You Are Done with the Relationship
If You’re a Narcissist
A narcissist will use manipulation to try to get you to make them feel bad about themselves or your situation. Usually, this is done by threatening to hurt or even kill themselves. It can also be accomplished by making you feel guilty about the way you feel. It’s important to recognize that these behaviors are narcissist tactics, and to avoid them, you should avoid getting involved with them.
Also read: “Effects of Narcissistic Abuse on Future Relationships.”
The narcissist will likely act in one of two ways when they realize you are done. They might act aggressively and hurtful toward you, or they might try to charm you into staying. If this doesn’t work, they will look for someone else to use.
In order to get what they want, a narcissist will attempt to manipulate and take control of you. This will involve deflection, deception, and lying. When you disagree with their demands, they will use this to reestablish control of your life. They may also manipulate and bully you to do what they want. If you do not comply, the narc will get even angrier.
It is important to understand that a narcissist is not likely to understand the reasons you want to leave. While you may want to leave for your mental health, a narcissist will want you back so that they can replenish their supply of narcissistic gratification. If you confront the narcissist about this behavior, he or she will likely cry and withdraw into themselves.
Steps to Take
The first thing to remember is that the narcissist will try to win you back with dishonesty, deflection, and control. You need to stand up for yourself and make your own decisions. A narc isn’t likely to abandon you voluntarily, because they hate losing control. It will take time and resources to groom another target. Moreover, refusing to comply with their demands can drive them crazy.
The next step is to set boundaries. This doesn’t mean that you should ignore them, but that you need to make sure that they know you’re not giving in to their demands. Setting limits and enforcing them can help you build your resilience and self-esteem. You can also consider consulting a therapist. They’ll be able to give you advice on how to handle such a situation without putting yourself in danger.
Dealing with a Narcissist
When you realize you are done with dealing with a narcissist, the first thing you need to do is get out of the relationship. If you find yourself feeling increasingly depressed, angry, or irritated, you should consider the possibility of breaking up with the person. Narcissists are notoriously difficult to change. They are often driven by self-centered, self-serving desires and cannot change unless given the proper tools to help them change.
You need to understand that narcissists do not understand how to feel, so they are unlikely to feel any guilt or remorse. Because they do not understand their own feelings, they tend to think that their negative feelings are caused by something outside of themselves. They also fail to understand that negative feelings are caused by biochemistry and not by anything external.